In looking back over my time here in St. Rodrigue, I find it hard to believe that it has only been a year. The end has come about just as the beginning had. I spent most of the time leading up to my leaving for Lesotho thinking it would never actually happen. I would talk about the upcoming year, explain what I would be doing, how I would be living, but it never actually sunk in. Suddenly, I had a week left in the States, I had quit my job, and the only things standing between me and an eighteen hour plane ride werepacking and saying my good-byes.
And now, my time here is ending. After months of thinking ahead to December and how it would feel to leave here, it's here and the reality of it doesn't quite make sense. For eleven months, through good and bad, I have tied myself to St. Rodrigue, and now I have to walk away. In some places, in some people I can see the impact I have made. In others, I can only hope that it is felt.
As the environment and curriculum at St. Rodrigue evolves, so does the role of the Grinnell Fellows there. Certain decisions, such as phasing out the teaching of Geography, limit the students' understanding of the world around them. This year, both Emily and I have had to step up to the challenge of making these girls' small worlds larger.
In this extremely small, land-locked country, many students look no further than their own borders. Their biggest dreams would be fulfilled, if only they could move to Maseru. In a writing assignment I gave one of my classes, the girls had to finish the statement, "If I could go anywhere, I would go to . . . ." Out of a class of 50 girls, only one wanted to go somewhere beyond Lesotho. When asked what they would like to do when they finish with their schooling, almost all of my students respond, "teacher, nurse, or policewoman." When asked, "Why?" the first response is, "Money," and occasionally this is followed by, "and I want to help people." And when a day of rough classes landed me in lecture-mode, one of my most-used comments to my students became, "I shouldnot want more for your life than you want for yourself." Unfortunately, with most of my girls that is the case.
From what I have seen, these girls are limited from very early on - economically, educationally and socially. In their lives, little is expected from them, and the majority fulfill these expectations. This year, Emily and I attempted to raise those expectations, to challenge them to do more with what they have, to value themselves, to believe in themselves, and to want the best for their lives - a tall order for eleven months. We have fought so hard for these girls. It's frightening to think that some of the students might nothave someone fight for them again. Hopefully, though, they will fight for themselves.
