Email/Online Communication and Conflict Escalation

Electronic communication has many advantages. However, some features of electronic communication tend to escalate conflict. Using email for difficult conversation is possible but requires thoughtfulness and a great deal of care to be done constructively. Conflict is a part of life and need not be viewed negatively. Handled constructively, it can lead to personal and professional growth.

See the tips below for handling online communications effectively.

Tip #1 – Consider a phone call or video conference, especially for difficult conversations.

While working and learning across the globe, many of us can still make phone or video calls without incurring additional charges. When available, a phone call or video conference may allow you to pick up on non-verbal cues and address miscommunications before they escalate to misunderstandings and disagreements. Remember, colleagues or students may be in different time zones. Do check time zones when placing a phone or video call.

Tip #2 – Avoid the “reply all” button.

Save many the time and thought that is spent on reviewing messages that do not concern them. Use reply all only when absolutely necessary to share important information that impacts all members of the group.

Tip #3 – Be careful who you copy.

When you are in a disagreement with someone and feel tempted to create a record, avoid escalating conflict by unnecessarily copying others. Ask the following questions:

  • Will this create difficulties for the recipient?
  • What is my real purpose here?
  • Am I sending the message only to those who need to read it?

Preserving the relationship can mean refraining from cc others not directly involved.

Tip #4 – Consider security. Anything you put in the digital realm can become public.

Avoid sharing sensitive or confidential information by email. When you must, consider sending encrypted or locked documents. Yes, this may be a hassle or time consuming. ITS can provide assistance and make the process a little more stress free.

Tip #5 – Review your message for clarity and intentions.

You never know how your readers might interpret your message. If your message is one that is likely to elicit a defensive reaction, open with statements that clearly communicate your good intentions, or even your fears about the recipients potential misunderstanding of your intentions.

E.g. I have concerns I want to express about our monthly meetings. I want to describe them, and I am worried that you may view this as me usurping the meeting or micromanaging. I am not. I just want to contribute to us having a productive meeting. …

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